Recently on a visit to Sydney to spend time with a girlfriend, we spend time at a bar with some of her colleagues- a conversation came up about the un-qualitative measure of the question “what do you do?”….
A question we conversed over as being one that gets over used in the meeting of strangers (especially in the city, perhaps it comes back to the ol’ networking mind, always being switched on) and we found consequently it is not a good or interesting conversation starter. As a very good friend of mine who beside having a “successful” job, is also a creative person- having a practical discipline and parallel’s herself to other pastimes and also doesn’t feel a job is the signifier of a person. I find this to be a very refreshing perspective.
I then recently came across a chapter “Cultivating meaningful work”, which looked at the struggle to define who we are and what we do in an honest way. It looks at how most people have many job titles in life, for an example I would already highlight many titles; artist, partner, creative thinker, student, sister, daughter, waitress, cleaner, philosopher, gardener. As all of these things make up who I am, so the question seems to be a very tricky one- were you either give a very long- winded answer and confuse the person or you share how you make money, which I find to be rather impersonal.
The author Brene Brown, of this insightful book: The Gifts of Imperfection, introduces Marci Alboer’s idea of one person/multiple careers, which is a winning model for a lot of creative people.
This slash effect is a beautiful thing and I don’t think it should be looked upon with any less respect. Some examples that are given in this book are lawyer/chef, management consultant/ cartoonist, surgeon/ playwright. Which on reflection, I understand many people I know have attained multiple careers but don’t admit to it as being a “career”, with little money being attached to the role.
My dream slash would be artist/yoga teacher/curator…. but my mind and ideas are still evolving and in the process I will grow to understand myself as a curious person with many interests.
I like to think of other more connecting conversation starters like… “How was your day?” or sharing some gratitude with the new friend like “How beautiful has the Weather been?” or “That’s a beautiful necklace, is it handmade?”.
Its nice to see the multi-dimensional aspect to people and their life, even if they don’t see it. It turns an expected bit of small talk, into an interesting/ maybe even insightful conversation. Here’s a fitting quote id like to sign off with,
“Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, an go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive” Howard Thurman
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